Spirit

Encouragement from the Scriptures necessary for spiritual wellness.

Since October

by ladypbwiggins

Many of you followed my postings last year regarding our journey through my husband’s life scare. I don’t know if I thanked you, so Thank you for your support. I have learned that 2015 was a horrific year for a great many people. I pray that it was a time of spiritual growth for you as it was for us.

To recap

  1. Massive heart attack on March 27, 2015
  2. Stopped breathing and needed electrical shock 3 times before conversion
  3. Months of hospitalization and rehabilitation care centers followed.

During those rehabilitation stays he struggled to regain the use of his legs. So what has happened since the first rehab stay.

  1. He was taken off Mexilitine.He was given that drug to counteract the worst, Amiodarone. Amiodarone was not his friend. It caused severe blood pressure drops and may have been the cause of some of the tachycardia events, however, I can’t prove it. It took awhile but it was finally replaced with a less toxic drug o September 28.  I had to fight but was successful.
  2. We changed cardiologist and that was a great blessing.
  3. He decided to stop taking Atorvastatin and the Qvar. He decided to control his cholesterol with his diet and he said he could breath fine without that inhaler.
  4. Oh, he lost almost 100 lbs over the 10 month period.

Since October

  1. After his last Ventricular tachycardia episode on September 27, a pacemaker/defibrillator was implanted on October 1.
  2. He came home on October 6th using a wheelchair. He had a few attempts with a walker. He has gone from wheelchair to walker to cane. He still needs the walker for long distances but for someone who was not believed to live and then not ever to walk this is awesome.
  3. His memory is improving but his meds are creating some interference. He is overcoming.
  4. We have learned so much about our power and authority when dealing with the medical community. We are empowered and plan to share that knowledge.
  5. We have learned how to eat even better with targeted focus for health reasons, heart and brain.

God planned and provided the best foods for our health,

the slave master changed our diet to the worst because it wasn’t what we ate n Africa,

and now we choose to continue to eat what sickens and is designed to kill us.

Please let’s help each other leave the plantation.

We can make soul food healthy.

Thank you for praying for us and supporting us. We thank you for your continued prayers and support.

In His Love

 

The 7th Month and Then…..

by ladypbwiggins

October 28th marks the end of the 7th month of our health journey; the one that began with my husband’s cardiac arrest in our bathroom. Seven is the number of completion. The seventh day God rested.This month has not been restful but as I compare it to the first six, yes it has.

Many things have changed in these last 7 months.

  • Carl has lost about 100 lbs. He is no longer considered obese.
  • We are more committed to eating a cleaner, nutritious diet.
  • I have learned more about the Kaiser Permanente System than I ever hoped to know.
  • I have learned some medical protocols that we all need to know.
  • I have learned just how much power an insistent advocate has; especially one whose on God’s team.
  • A car accident resulted in a new, more functional vehicle.  Romans 8:28
  • We have learned who our real friends are.
  • We have learned the meaning of Malachi 3:
    • “Good measure, pressed down, shaken together shall men (women) give into your bosom.”
  • Most of all, we have learned many lessons about God’s faithfulness. 

As October 28th approaches, my thoughts go to the prayers for October 29th, the 8th month. Eight is the number of new beginnings. So what is my desire for the 8th month,

  • The good work that God has begun to continue.
    • I desire complete healing for my husband.
    • I desire God’s revelation of His plan for our new lives.
      • I know this experience was not just for us to learn. There must be a greater purpose.
    • I desire a financial opportunity enveloped in that plan.
  • I desire leisure time with my husband. A trip to Santa Barbara or Carmel would be lovely.
  • I desire NO doctor visits that are not routine checkups for either of us. No hospital stays.

The 8th month will provide an awesome Thanksgiving. We have so much for which to be thankful. I think I will begin now.

Thank You

To All who have supported us with your prayers, dinners, rides, and finances.

To All the doctors, nurses, and therapists who have helped us and taught me.

To Eagles Wings Christian Church family.

To our personal family.

To my God.

Who has sheltered us, protected us, and kept us.

Psalm 91

Changed!

by ladypbwiggins

The last 7 months have been a life changing experience. It has not only changed Carl and I, but you. Yes, you. Who are You?   “You” live in three groups.

Group 1

You who

  1.  Walked with us through this fire journey with us.
  2. Believed God in spite of what you saw.

Group 2

You who

  1. Prayed but lacked faith that they would be answered.
  2. Thought I had lost my mind and all sense of reasoning but stood with me anyway.

Group 3

You who

  1. Watched on the sidelines
  2. Thought Group 1 and 2 were crazy but hoped we were right.

How have you changed? I don’t know but you do.

I suspect whatever group you are in, your faith in God has increased.

I suspect you believe the impossible is more possible than you did before.

You are permanently changed!

The Doctors Said

by ladypbwiggins

The Doctors said he wouldn’t live. He did.

The Doctors said he wouldn’t remember. He does, more everyday.

The Doctors said he wouldn’t walk again. He is, farther everyday.

The Doctors said….

Don’t get me wrong. Doctors have their usefulness. However, they are not the last word.

Whose report will you believe? The Doctors’ or God’s.

When Passion Dies

by ladypbwiggins

When Passion Dies

A loss

Your self Missing

In Action

Like arid desert roaming

One drop mirage to satisfy.

Interest, joy, purpose

locked away in the dark vault of

Not forgotten.

When Passion dies

Dreams die

Don’t let your Dreams die.

Fulfill them..

During The Five Months

by ladypbwiggins

I learned

  • What it really meant to walk by “faith and not by sight.” So often we spout those words so piously and we do not understand the depth that they take you or at least that was my experience. Often we have faith as long as we can think of a few options on our own just in case God takes too long. In these 5 months I had no options of my own. The doctors were not sure what was causing his tachycardia. Very few understood my hope of his healing mentally and physically. Most thought I was in denial and delusional. But I knew what God did that night and what it meant.
  • That others would NOT understand and you might very well have to walk this journey alone.
  • That blessings and support would come from the most unexpected places and unexpected ways.
  • To question everything the doctors do. Research procedures and medications. Insert myself into their rounds. Demand explanations. Know what the drugs are, what they do and the side effects. It is your right and responsibility.
  • The more specialized a doctor or department is the less likely they will communicate with other doctors unless you demand it.
  • To LISTEN very carefully.
  • To document what I heard. I must confess I learned to apply that later than I should have but do it.
  • More about Kaiser Permenente  system than I every thought I would need.
  • God’s timing is perfect but not mine.
  • How to be peaceful in a storm.
  • What is important in life. My God, my loved ones. The rest is fluff and fill to make our lives more comfortable and enjoyable.
  • To expectantly watch God work.
  • To learn

Many of these lessons I am still learning but this experience has changed me. I don’t know how God is going to use what we have gone through but I know it was not for us alone. Waiting expectantly.

Five Months Ago Tonight

by ladypbwiggins

Five  months ago tonight, March 27, my husband flat-lined.

Five months ago tonight I faced the loss of my best friend and love.

Five months ago tonight I prayed if it is his time take him or heal him. I don’t want him to suffer.

Five months ago tonight I spent the night in emergency.

Five months ago tonight I began a painful, terrifying, horrific, rewarding journey.

Five months ago tonight I began to learn to trust what God said rather than what I saw.

Five months ago tonight I believe God answered my prayer by breathing life into Carl.

The scripture that came to me was Psalm 91 and therein I believed lay my promise.

Psalm 91:14-16 (ESV)
14  “Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him; I will protect him, because he knows my name.
15  When he calls to me, I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will rescue him and honor him.
16  With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.”

Here we are five months later and he is back in the hospital but things are so very different.

God is still fulfilling that promise in very interesting ways.

God is Masterfully orchestrating our lives.

Dark Chocolate!

by ladypbwiggins

Dark Chocolate,

Nappy Hair,

They pay big bucks to get what YOU got.

Yet you are made fun of even by your own

and Denied access to the best.

Why do we accept the “Paper bag” test?

Why do you have to prove yourself worthy more than the rest?

It is interesting that

The dark piece anchors the quilt design

The dark one draws the eye in a picture or a chorus line.

The rarest of gems are black or darkest in hue.

Consider the black diamond, black opal, chocolate diamond,

the deepest ruby and sapphire.

Oh, how precious and rare, just like you.

Even in food

The darker the color the richer and more beneficial

You know that green, red, yellow veggie or fruit.

Could it be that you are so maligned because

You are Intensely Richer.

You are More Beneficial.

You are Visually Overwhelming,

 Powerfully Stunning,

You are Stronger

You are More Precious, Priceless?

It is recorded that Dark Chocolate is good for anti-aging.

Could that be why black don’t crack?

DARK CHOCOLATE, NAPPY HAIR

You got it going on!

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!

It Would Be So Easy

by ladypbwiggins

It would be so easy to hate the shooter in the Charleston Church.

Nine dead for no obvious reason but hatred.

It would be so easy to hate the system and environment that bred that hatred.

It would  be so easy to travel back in time to slavery in the Carolinas and

Hate all slave owners, slave brokers and the good people who said nothing.

It would be so easy to blame his parents and

Hate them.

It would be so easy!

But rather I choose to do the HARD thing.

I choose to pray for the hearts and minds of the victims’ families

That they forgive the shooter in the midst of their grief.

I choose to pray for change in the shooter’s mind.

Living life abundantly, securely not fearfully for others.

I choose to forgive the system that bred this hatred.

I choose to understand that they are not living free

But bound in the prison of hatred and they don’t know it.

I choose the HARD thing.

Otherwise, I will become bound in the chains of hate;

My words will shoot the bullets of anger and hatred.

I will become him.

I choose the Hard thing.

27  “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
28  bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. 

Luke 6:27-28 (ESV) 

“Moment” Lessons

by ladypbwiggins

It has been almost two months since my husband’s heart attack. There have been so many life changing moments since that night. Each moment was a lesson in seeing through the lens of “Cause God Said So!”

One Specific Lesson Moment

I thought the hardest part was during the attacks. Little did I know the hardest times would be dealing with medical professionals. What made that so hard you might ask?

Attitude!

Yes, attitude; mine and theirs.

I have met some really great professionals during this journey and I am very grateful to them. But…

I have met some really arrogant “professionals.” Some doctors think their degree and training elevated them to a position higher than God. They believe they are infallible. They do not treat people but diseases. The most arrogant and collectively obnoxious was a skilled neurological team that did not see my husband the man but a specimen that needed to be commanded into some pre-defined category. They didn’t even regard the observations of the nurses on the team who were the front line for gathering intel. It never occurred to them that the person they were commanding was really manipulating them. Had they considered the man and the comments of the nurses, they would have known there was more to know.

These doctors decided that my husband’s mental condition was frail and we should accept that he is just barely above “vegetative” status. They said this in his presence. Now I must tell you that their job was to determine if he was mentally capable of understanding instructions to take care of a defibrillator implant. It turns out, he did not want the surgery. (He had a tracheotomy so he couldn’t verbally tell us) He decided to behave in a manner consistent with their findings when they came in to evaluate him. It became a very entertaining time for us and the nursing staff. We watched my husband transition from a very engaging, communicative, responsive man to a near zombie when they walked into the room. When they left, he returned to that communicative, responsive man. Now tell me, who was commanding whom?

My lesson was more about me than them. I wanted to tell them how arrogant they were. I wanted to remind them that they did not know everything and they should learn to listen to others. I wanted to remind them that they were just practicing and God was holding the deity spot for himself. That was what I wanted. God’s Spirit kept me quiet and showed me my unbecoming attitude. There was a better way to handle this. It came in the form of a survey.

More importantly, my attitude changed. I realized I could not change them in a state of anger. I realized I could not change them at all. That is God’s job. My job was to advocate for my husband with respect, God’s wisdom, firmness and love. It has been hard. I haven’t always succeeded but I am getting there.

I have so many more “moment” lessons to share but this one seems ongoing. I am sure it will pop up again. It is all about the attitude.